Keeping Up With Me

Wednesday, October 6

Getting ready to see friends
Go to the mirror put on makeup on
To hide my true self.
Is this what life is about?
To hide.
I see my friends flirty & girly.
I try to be happy an like them,
but all I feel is alone.
No-one here to help me
I am different to my friends.
I am different, fun, happy girly
but is that me?
I go back to the mirror
an all I see is an unknown girl
trying to find away out
but I am hidden
I hide my true self
I am no one.
People have skeletons in there closet.
I have masks.
What do you have?

The Wound Left .

The wound left by the blade of steel bleeds out as she lies head in hand.
Wondering why her once seemingly perfect life took such a terrible stand.

She cries every night craving what her old, perfect life used to hold.
Her friends, her smile, her family, her unbreakable stronghold.

Her heart is broken by the one who she thought she loved more then anything.
He took her heart, her trust and her love and threw it away, now her wrists are aching.

Her love he threw away was all that had kept her safe, kept her alive.
Now without the feeling of being cared for she can’t find a reason to survive.

She wants to live, she really does but, without his love she doesn’t see the appeal.
Any way out, any plan for escape she can’t find anything to do, this seems unreal.

Her world spiraling out of control as she just makes another blood covered line.
She didn’t know all of this would happen when he left, she figured she’d be fine.

But, without his love and affection her life that used to be perfect was now pointless.
She didn’t know anything would come out of her blood red marks, she figured it was harmess.

You try telling her they’re harmless now as she lies dead, six feet underneath the ground.
She was crying out, screaming at the world, just hoping to be noticed, hoping to be found.

Her “harmless” cuts were just the begining, they let her depression consume her.
If only someone had heard her cries out for help, maybe her life would’ve ended better.

All because he didn’t love her back, he didn’t feel the same emotions that she lived on.
She took those emotions way to far, she sacrificed her life over this one person being gone.

She love him so much but, He never knew all of the pain that she went through.
He didn’t know how much she cared, he never could see how he had made her new.

She loved him with her whole heart, but love doesn’t get translated from the grave.
If only she would have held on if only she wouldn’t have given in and caved.

She would be alive, happy and maybe even in his arms if she hadnt made that cut.
After that her life wasn’t happy or better or anything, infact it was anything but.

Sunday, October 3

Will be you still there for me all the time ?

As the sun goes down in front of me
It reminds of me of where I want to be
With you and you alone
Hold me in like you were made for me
I'm losing faith in gravity
I just need to let you know
And I just need to let you know
I'm not going to come down
Down off of these clouds
All these heroes come and go
But you're still standing
You teach me to rise up
To open my eyes up
All these heroes come and go
But you're still standing.
- David Cook
This song keeps playing on your birthday .You're my heroes and forever do .Recalling back the first time we meet each other when our face is still so chubby and non pimples face . WTF haha We will not that close but we did say hey in the informal way I guess ? Pfff okay , Form 3 was kinda a blast , had so much fun end of the years . Remember you're the first 1 which saw my phone that I text with "erm" , remember ? haha Having a hard time with erm for like 2 years man . WTF

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing
I need to find you
I gotta find you
You're the missing piece I need, the song inside of me
I need to find you
I gotta find you.
- Joe Jonas
This song is insane man . hahaha Oh well , I already moved forward my life since the trip so ya . You're the 1 who keep telling me that moved forward arran , erm is useless . Hahaha alot people use the same way but I only will listen what you say btw I OWN YOU ALOT . Yes , I was not that happy about what happen this year , 2010 is totally diffrent . My wish for last years is , GOD Please make 2010 a great year . but ..... seems that God make it 360 degree diffrent . Oh well , this is life kan , what can I do ?
2009 - It was a blast year for me maybe you . You had fall in love with someone and I got to meet a bunch of amazing people . I am glad about that .
Why I keep talking about my life man ? WTF is your birthday SOFIA .
Hello Beautiful
How's it going?
I hear it's wonderful in California
I've been missing you it's true
But tonight I'm gonna fly
Yea tonight I'm gonna fly
'cause I could go across the world
See everything and never be satisfied
If I couldn't see those eyes.